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January-March, 2017

Beyond Acceptance Is Perfect Love

by Rev. Andrea Sassa Archuleta, O.M.C.

Walking with wandering eyes, I rest my gaze upon the statuesque pines before me, drawn to the long crevices in between their layered fertile skins — those scented crevices of sweet vanilla — and I feel how comfortably seated these pines are in being the forest.

“So, they don’t have feelings of sadness or loneliness in them?” I ask.

“Well, they might. But they don’t get attached to those feelings,” is Spirit’s reply.

“But, what does that mean, to ‘not get attached?’ Everyone says that — about being in non-attachment as the way to emotional and spiritual freedom. But how do I live non-attachment when the feelings seem so real, like I can’t out run them, can’t put them away or out of me.”

Are you willing to try not out-running them, not putting them out of you? Just letting them be in you and allowing them to exist, accepting that some part of you – maybe remnants of some life experiences – introduced those feelings and all those feelings need to know is that it is OK for them to be there.

Trusting, I reply, “I can try that.” 

Bella, my 4-legged companion, and I continue hiking. Long, pointed pine needles and lushly textured cones — plump with cherished pinon seeds - blanket the forest floor sheltering tree roots. Winter is coming. 

“I can accept that I’ve had experiences where I have felt sad and lonely. I can accept that these feelings are in me and that is OK.”

Animal tracks walk on the trail’s deep-brown earth with us. A deer, maybe an elk. The stride in between each hoof-print is long, like that of a large animal. A buck? Bella alights to track our unseen friend. 

“You know, it feels like all I have to do is let the feelings be there and not judge myself for them. I think that is where I get entangled. When I am feeling sad or lonely and I start talking to myself, saying things like — ‘Well, come on, aren’t you over this yet? Don’t feel this way, let’s get on with it already.’ So, I’m not accepting myself then, all of my Self.”

No, not really. You’re safe, you know, to feel anything and everything. All I want is for you to be exactly who you are. Sad or lonely, shy, even scared; it’s all OK with Me. I accept you exactly as you are, in every moment.

I look up from the trail, to those statuesque pines, asking, “What do they do when they feel sad or lonely, do they ever feel sad or lonely?” 

They may. But even in this, the trees don’t forget what they are, ever-knowing their True nature.

“Oh,” settles across my inquisitive mind. I stand quiet in the forest.

Gazing towards the pines, I see them within the completeness of the forest. I hear myself say, “Oohhh,” again. A soothing peace nestles into my heart.

And I understand. The duality of the role I play as embodied Love — being only Light and at the same time being oh, so human. And I remember, yet again, “I am the light of the world. How holy am I, who have been given the function of lighting up the world! In its calm light let all my conflicts disappear. In its peace let me remember Who I am.” (W-pI.81.1:2-5)

© 2016, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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