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April-June, 2014

We Don’t Need to Settle for Halfway Houses

by Rev. Ken Gorman, O.M.C.

The Course says that the problem is not that we ask for too much, but far, far too little. (Lesson 133) It is encouraging us that the real goal of total awakening to our true nature and our relationship with God is the only one worth achieving. In fact, as only God’s plan for salvation will work, it would seem that this is the only game in town. In fact, why would we want to settle for anything less than remembering who we are as unlimited beings, one with God and each other where our true nature is peace and happiness itself? What ‘in the world’ would cause us to have lesser goals than this?

In fact, this is exactly what seems to happen with many of us (including me). We set all kinds of goals in bodies that we think have value. Lesser goals of things like great wealth and fame are well understood by most of us at this point as fleeting and not really what brings the lasting happiness and peace our hearts yearn for. They are simply more of the ego’s siren song of ‘seek and do not find’ to keep us mesmerized in the dream with it squarely as the center of authority.

But I have found that when we start to give up on these ego-based goals, often new goals can emerge which are now ‘spiritual.’ They now have a spiritual context and use spiritual language so we convince ourselves that we are now on the right track with our new found spiritual goals and spiritual path. The problem is that these also are often formed within the framework of the ego thought system… and in the end, it can be the same game with a new look and feel:

• The goals are still body oriented, which reinforces this as our identity.

• We have a lot to do based on our own understanding to save the world and ourselves… such a great responsibility and calling, it feels almost overwhelming (and set up for failure as usual).

• We now have a spiritual program and practices that we can demonstrably fail at (like everything else), which re-enforces our identity as unworthy.

• We can now subtly or overtly judge others who do not hold our lofty views and aspirations.

• Our ego is firmly in the driver’s seat to determine (judge) all of the above based on its own evaluation.

• We now have a firm set of goals and contexts within a body that is real and a world that is real and a path to get to some outcome within this in the future, which is necessary because of the past… We seek and do not find the present moment, where our true nature is already shining now.

What is the answer to this? For me, intention/willingness and surrender are all I have to offer to this path. Any time I think I understand something and have a plan, I have found I am actually getting in the way. I think this is articulated best for me in ACIM Text 18:IV.7 on page 380 where it is made clear that I am already all I will ever be right now and that my real job is to get out of the way so the blocks obscuring this fact from my awareness of this can be removed. In fact, I do not even seem very capable really of doing even this on my own. So really what is asked for is that I am willing to be willing and Holy Spirit somehow does the rest… which puts us back to intention, surrender and then relax (accept/embrace/allow).

We also have to remember that in the ACIM Introduction He is clear that the aim of the Course is “…removing the blocks to the awareness of Love…” To me this implies it is not about accumulation or transformation as we eternally are as God created us. As I created these blocks, I need to let Holy Spirit do the removing with my permission.

I think the Course teaches about ‘big’ things to motivate us to be willing and surrender totally as they are so far out of reach from an ego perspective. Things like we are not bodies or that Christ Vision shows us a totally different perspective (“Nothing that you think you see here bears any resemblance to what vision will show you” - Lesson 45), that we need not believe in death, sickness is not real, the world never happened, etc. I feel like purpose of this is to get us to be willing and wanting the really big goals and to discard all of the little goals our ego throws up to keep us stuck and subtly re enforce its thought system with smaller ‘spiritual goals’ that keep us hooked. I call these ‘half way houses’ and they are yet another thing I am learning to surrender to Holy Spirit for healing.

© 2014, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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